Questions That Get To The Heart Of Confidence

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As I mentioned last week, Ashley, a serious student of confidence, asked some key questions in an email exchange about practical techniques for strengthening confidence.

The following are Ashley’s specific questions, along with helpful ideas:

“What strategies helped you to become more confident?”

How do you handle negative people?”

“What encouraged you to tell your story?”

“(I know everyone is different) but how long did it take you to become confident?”

“Do you have any advice for people who are struggling with self image?”

Strategies To Strengthen Confidence

High-level ideas such as preparation, self-care and progressing in spite of fear came to mind immediately, but seemed insufficient. They lacked the tactical day-by-day, and sometimes moment-by-moment, training necessary for such progress.

Slowing the process down considerably and getting to the heart of what allows you to make meaningful progress every day, the method was clear—“Decide, breathe, focus and then keep breathing.” Each step helps you remain focused on growth in the midst of perceived attacks.

Decide

I belong;

I matter;

I am a success;

I am valuable, worthwhile and completely lovable;

I have what it takes;

I live my values/message/mission;

I am dedicated to reaching an outcome that matters to me; and,

Everything I need is always available to me in the moment I need it.

Breathe

As you progress toward the results that matter to you, it’s easy to get caught up in battling the very people and experiences that are striving to help you. Time and energy are wasted as your brain alerts you of impending danger.

By learning to pause in the moments you’re feeling attacked, and taking slow, deep breaths until you can find the time and space you need to process, you will resist reacting as you continue progressing toward the outcome you decided is important.  An increase in self-confidence is a direct result of coming to know yourself.

Focus

By clarifying the specific outcome you decide is meaningful, you free yourself to remain focused on reaching your outcome. Such focus gives you an increasing ability to remain present and calm even when it feels like someone is attacking you. By knowing deep inside that you are valuable, worthwhile and completely loved, you open yourself to learning and growing from each experience.

Before I got a glimpse of the value I bring, I wasted time and energy trying to get other people to do what I thought was best. By focusing on the outcome I’m committed to, along with value I bring, I free my time and energy to focus on the outcomes that matter to me. The more I do that, the more energy I have to share.

This is a lifelong process, and progress is way better than perfection.

Stay tuned… Next week we’ll get into Ashley’s final four questions:

How do you handle negative people?”

“What encouraged you to tell your story?”

“(I know everyone is different) but how long did it take you to become confident?”

“Do you have any advice for people who are struggling with self image?”

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