She had everything ready — the numbers, the projections, the polished pitch. But something was missing. Something that couldn’t be found in a spreadsheet or a business plan.
I met with a woman recently who was preparing to pitch her business idea to investors. She already had her numbers and projections together — a solid business plan, polished and professional.
But as she read through her pitch, something in me stirred. It was good… but it didn’t move me.
So I asked her, “Why is this business so important to you?”
At first, she gave the logical answer — the kind of answer you might give in an interview. Then she paused, took a deep breath, and began to share something different.
She told me that years ago, she’d gone through a dark time — one filled with anxiety, loss, and confusion about her place in the world. And during that season, movement became her medicine. Exercise became her way back to herself. What she wanted to build — a wellness studio — wasn’t just a business. It was a place of healing.
When she finished, I said, “That’s where your pitch needs to begin.”
She looked at me with wide eyes, hesitant. “You really think that’s enough?”
I smiled. “It’s more than enough. It’s the truth.”
But I could see the doubt linger. Beneath her polished confidence was the same fear so many of us carry — what if I’m not enough?
The Fear of Vulnerability
That moment hit close to home for me. Because I’ve been there too.
When I first started The Lewes Leadership Lunch, I didn’t start it because I had all the answers or the perfect strategy. I started it because I was craving connection — real, human connection — and depth in conversation. I wanted a sense of belonging within my own community.
And for a long time, I wondered if that reason was “enough.”
As I shared that with her, tears filled her eyes.
She took a breath and said softly, “There’s a quote by Maya Angelou that I’ve always loved: People will forget what you said, but they’ll never forget how you made them feel. That’s how you just made me feel — seen and connected.”
Her words reminded me that vulnerability isn’t just about what we say — it’s about how we make others feel through our honesty and presence.
The Challenge of Leading with Vulnerability
It struck me then how often leaders are told to be vulnerable but not shown how.
Her mentors had told her the same thing — “share more of yourself.” But telling someone to be vulnerable isn’t the same as showing them what it looks like in action.
Vulnerability isn’t a technique — it’s a choice. It’s the willingness to stand in truth even when our voice shakes.
If I had responded to her with a list of leadership theories, she might have nodded politely. But when I met her with honesty — with my own story of longing and doubt — she felt what I was trying to teach.
That’s leadership.
We don’t teach vulnerability by commanding it — we model it.
We don’t inspire courage by demanding it — we embody it.
How to Lead Through Vulnerability
So how do we, as leaders, practice vulnerability in a way that inspires connection and trust? Here are a few ways to start:
- Share Your Why: Be honest about what drives you. Whether it’s a personal story or a deep value, let people see the heart behind your actions.
- Acknowledge Your Doubts: You don’t have to have all the answers. Admitting uncertainty or asking for input shows humility and invites collaboration.
- Connect Through Stories: Facts inform, but stories move people. Share moments that shaped you, even if they feel imperfect.
- Be Present: Vulnerability isn’t just about what you say — it’s about how you listen, how you show up, and how you make others feel.
- Start Small: You don’t have to bare your soul all at once. Begin with small, authentic moments of honesty and build from there.
Vulnerability doesn’t mean oversharing or spilling every detail of your life. It means sharing the parts of your story that connect to your purpose, your values, and the people you’re leading. It’s about showing your humanity in a way that invites others to do the same.
A Personal Reflection
Over the years, I’ve learned that vulnerability isn’t a weakness — it’s a strength. It’s what allows us to connect, to inspire, and to lead in a way that’s truly human.
Maybe that woman will lean on a bit of my vulnerability to find her own strength. And maybe, in doing so, she’ll inspire someone else to do the same.
That’s how it spreads — one honest story at a time.
Your Turn
So here’s my invitation to you:
What’s one story you’ve been hesitant to share? What truth could you stand in, even if your voice shakes?
Start there. You might be surprised by the connection and courage it inspires.
Looking to deepen the conversation?
Misti Burmeister speaks to leaders and teams about trust, communication, and the human dynamics that shape real performance. Her work helps people notice what’s happening beneath the surface—so better decisions, stronger relationships, and healthier cultures can emerge.
If you’re exploring a speaker for an upcoming event, workshop, or retreat, Misti would love to connect.
Reach out: [email protected]
Here’s To Your Greatness,
Misti Burmeister
Misti Burmeister is a dynamic coach and speaker with an unparalleled ability to unlock potential and inspire transformation. Known for her energy, enthusiasm, and passion, Misti awakens thought patterns and fosters meaningful change in individuals and teams alike. With over 20 years of experience, she is celebrated for improving communication, accountability, and personal responsibility across organizations.
Described as a “world-class archeologist” by Captain Ken Barrett, U.S. Navy, Misti excels at uncovering the hidden treasures within every person she interacts with. Her groundbreaking philosophies on two-way communication and personal responsibility are the foundation for lasting success, empowering organizations to achieve extraordinary results.