Welcome to Misti's Insights
Why People Don’t Listen to New Leaders
At the end of the last Lewes Leadership Lunch, a young manager came up to me and asked: “How do I get older employees to listen to me?” She went on to explain: “The people my age listen to me. They do what I tell them to do. But the older employees respond...
The Quiet Heartbreak of Undefined Grief in Uncertain Times
Grief isn’t always about losing someone who’s gone—it can be about losing what you hoped for. I call this “undefined grief.” It’s the pain of letting go—not of what was, but of what could have been. Right now, many of us are living with this kind of grief. It’s the...
Jellyfish, Fear, and Leading from Within
A couple of weeks ago, I had an experience that surprised me with just how much it revealed—not just about myself, but about leadership. I went for an open water swim, something I usually enjoy. I was wearing my second skin—a suit designed to protect the body from...
The Art of Listening: Start From the Top
What happened when I stopped pretending to listen—and what it taught me about being present. Last night, my friend Maya was talking to me about a difficult conversation she needs to have with someone on her team. It’s one of those situations where emotions,...
Loving the Body I Have (Even When It Hurts)
I recently spoke in a group where people come together to share their personal journeys. That morning, I found myself opening up about the chronic body pain I’ve been navigating for several years now. It’s the kind of pain that doesn’t just hurt physically—it limits,...
The $70 Lesson: When I Stopped Being Present and Started Performing
I don’t think most leaders realize how quickly obligation distorts presence. It took a $70 networking ticket for me to see it happen in real time—in myself. A colleague invited me to an event. At the time, I didn’t realize he had personally paid the guest fee. Before...
Control Is Often a Mask for Insecurity
If you’re leading significant change and facing resistance, this may be the most important question you ask yourself this year: Are you tightening strategy—or tightening control? The difference determines whether trust expands or erodes. An executive I work with...
On Fishing, Selling, and Why Purpose Makes All the Difference
Not long ago, I was standing in an office building with two people who are deeply connected to a leadership initiative I co-lead—L3, a free monthly lunch where local leaders gather to learn from and support each other. As we stood there chatting about which businesses...
Why Is It So Hard to Speak the Truth?
A few days ago, I set out walking toward a part of town where I knew there were businesses. It was a Sunday afternoon, so most places were closed. That’s why, when I noticed one garage door open at a pool company, I perked up. My first thought: the only person...
Find Your Gloves
Last year, I swam in open water and got stung by jellyfish — dozens of times. Even though I wore a protective suit, the stings still found the unprotected parts of my body: face, hands, feet. The pain lingered, and so did the memory. For eight weeks, I stayed out of...
Mirroring in Leadership: Why Belonging Is a Performance Multiplier
Mirroring in Leadership: Why Belonging Is a Performance Multiplier Most leaders believe belonging is about culture initiatives. What they often miss is that belonging is about identity. Many high-performing adults walk into organizations still negotiating their worth....
Why Avoiding Fear Destroys Trust at Work
A few months ago, something happened that my body did not register as small. I was playing with my six-year-old neighbor—full of energy, laughing, moving fast. At one point, I came down toward him with full gusto, ready to scoop him up and hug him. At the exact same...
When There’s Nothing to Fix: Why Connection Matters More Than Strategy
What I Noticed Over Lunch Yesterday, I sat down for lunch with a woman named Katrina—and it became a reflection on something I see often in leadership: what happens when there’s nothing to fix, but we still feel the urge to intervene. She owns a small construction...
When the Jersey Comes Off: Finding Identity Beyond What You Do
“If I’m not an athlete, then who am I?” It’s a question I first asked myself in college, when—for the first time—I couldn’t play sports. My body had defined me, my discipline had validated me, and my performance had given me belonging. When I lost that version of...
Power Over vs. Power With: A Leadership Shift We Desperately Need
Leadership is evolving. The old model of "power over"—where control, hierarchy, and compliance reign—no longer serves the dynamic, collaborative environments we need to thrive. Instead, a new paradigm is emerging: "power with." This shift isn’t just about leadership...
Leading Through Vulnerability
She had everything ready — the numbers, the projections, the polished pitch. But something was missing. Something that couldn’t be found in a spreadsheet or a business plan. I met with a woman recently who was preparing to pitch her business idea to investors. She...
The Art of Vulnerability (in a Swimming Pool)
The pool was quiet, the water still, and for a moment, I felt like I could finally breathe. A few mornings ago, I found myself standing at the edge of the pool in my neighborhood — the only indoor pool in the area. It’s often crowded, which is why I got there forty...
Dear Perfectionism: A Letter to My Inner Protector
Sometimes, the parts of us that once protected us end up holding us back. For most of my life, perfectionism was my armor — my way of feeling safe in a world that often felt unpredictable. It made me sharp, driven, and dependable. It helped me succeed. But as I’ve...