Getting Them To Want Your Stuff


People who want your stuff—want your stuff. You don’t have to force the gift that is you. The right people come and the wrong ones go. Your job is to focus on the ones who stay, even after you risked the possibility of rejection on the deepest level.

Reject who I was pretending to be? No problem. Reject, or avoid connecting with the “me” beneath the layers of my own uncertainty? No thank you. It’s hard enough to accept and embrace myself—I don’t need to worry about you.

Thinking everyone should stay, we struggle with the ones who don’t honor us.

“I’m out here on an edge—throw me a bone, please. Encourage me, support me, but please don’t tell me to ‘get over it,’” we think, embarrassed we haven’t gotten over the difficulty of embracing our own stories.

For the ones who cannot handle our courage to step into the truth of who we really are, for fear they might also be seen, please step to the side graciously. Step inside, if you can—and let your own journey to freedom begin.

While they might not be ready, you are. So, step unabashedly to the edge, peek over, and notice the calm you feel. Go back and forth if you need to. Before you know it, the cliff will gently grab your ankle and nudge you to feel the pure bliss that is you.

No, you don’t have to try to be you, and you don’t have to try to get anyone to want your stuff. What you have to do is keep noticing, celebrating, and sharing the art that so beautifully makes its way into your heart.

Architects, surgeons, accountants, and writers alike—there is a passion boiling in your soul, begging to be shared with the world. Can you hear it?

Get present, share your truth, your passion, and then allow—don’t force—the right people to come. Like moths to a shining ray of light in the darkest night, they will be attracted to the freedom emanating from your courage to do the simplest thing on the planet—be yourself.

Most people are trying to be the same without realizing it, and they end up attracting people who are just like them. Not many people opt for writing their own rules, or crafting their own stories—it’s easier to accept the stories we’ve been delivered, even if these stories drain years off our life.

Women shouldn’t …

Men should…

Children should never…

It seems easier to avoid the pain we think we’re going to confront when we show our true desires, interests, and passions, so instead we lie… about who we are… in an attempt to be like everyone else, which is even more painful. Why? Because we are betraying ourselves to become something we’re not. That’s painful.

But don’t worry, we’ll take our pain out on you because clearly you’re the reason we cannot be ourselves. Of course, that’s not true, but it is the lie we silently tell ourselves.

We want to share ourselves with the world, but it’s not safe. Not unless the people you’re with are willing to take the risk with you. “Come to the edge with me,” we unconsciously nudge, not recognizing if they are even ready. We’re all ready in our own time.

We think we need them to continue the journey, but we don’t. What we need is to keep peeking over the edge, noticing what we see, and embracing the thrill of the free fall.

What we need is to halt all attempts to show others the person we think they will like, and instead opt for the truth. Such radical self-acceptance is at the heart of what causes artists like Pharrell to sing from the depths of their soul, Freedom.

Here’s to Your Greatness,

Misti Burmeister

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