In an effort to avoid looking self-centered, unfocused or unproductive, it’s easy to fall into the trap of exhausting yourself by doing what you think you should do.

Said simply,

—Sharing time with people you love,


—Taking a vacation,

—Spending time in nature,

—Getting the rest your body needs,


—Snuggling your babies (including furry ones),

—Budgeting and saving for the long-term,

—Meditation, acupuncture, massage, and

Seeing your doctor on a regular basis are not often associated with activities that garner high praise.

Is self-care selfish?

In a society that worships “more”—hours worked, accolades acquired, and status, it can be challenging to find time to take care of yourself. Isn’t it selfish to put yourself first anyway?

No. If anything, it’s remarkably generous.

Self-care, defined—giving yourself the time and resources you need to care for yourself physically, intellectually, and spiritually.

The better you take care of yourself,

  • The easier it is to decipher what and who’s most important.
  • The more you have to offer the most important people and opportunities in your life.
  • The more others have a chance to learn through your example.

How to know where you need more self-care

For example, if you value quality time with your family, but you’re coming home exhausted, consider getting training to increase your ability to get work done through others. Hire a coach, take an online course, read a book or listen to podcasts to gain new ideas on how to engage your employees, and then put them into action.

The key is to recognize what’s not working for you, and than try something different.

When you take the time to take care of yourself, rejuvenate, learn and advance your own career, you inspire others to do the same. As a woman shared at a retreat I recently attended, “If everyone would just take care of themselves, then everyone would be taken care of.”

Taking care of yourself is an essential building block to self-confidence; self-care breeds self-confidence. Self-confidence leads to—

  • Decisiveness,
  • Increased ability to manage emotions,
  • Ability to remain focused, and ultimately,
  • Strengthens your ability to achieve great results through others.

The clarity, patience, compassion and presence you exude when you take care of your physical, emotional, intellectual and spiritual needs are worth the time and energy invested.

An example of self-care that improves self-confidence

For example, as a recovering perfectionist, it’s dangerously easy to let fear of imperfection run rampant, stopping me from deepening relationships or taking chances on myself. For this very reason, I pushed myself to enroll in my first improv class, where mistakes are central to the success of each scene.

In full disclosure, it took more a year to finally go to my first class. As a result, not only am I learning the fundamentals of improv, but I’m also meeting new and interesting people—self-care, on steroids for me.

How do you take care of yourself?

Do you have a story about how self-care led to increased confidence and improved results within your career? I’d love to hear it! Simply leave a comment below, or shot me an email at Misti at Misti Burmeister dot com.

Here’s to your greatness,

Misti Burmeister